Hi hot cute girly (and boy) geeks of mine. As promised, the review of the third mummy movie. And this review contains spoilers!!!
This movie differs a lot from the previous two, first off all, no Egypt but China, and second, no Rachel Weisz, she is replaced by Maria Bello for the role of Evy O’Connell. They even make a joke about it in the beginning of the movie.
We start off with a bit of a history lesson about the evil emperor and how he conquers everything, but one, immortality. He finds out a witch can do him a spell and asks his best man, General Yang, to fetch her. And as a good soldier he does and even helps her find the spell, but they also fall in love, the witch Zi Yuan and the general. Even though the emperor forbade this cause he wants to have the witch in his bed himself.
The emperor finds out, betrays the witch by killing Yang and thus dooming himself for the witch casts a curse over him and his army, turning them in the famous terracotta army. (Well, it’s different from what I learned in school). And as time goes by, the army is nothing more than some undiscovered dig site for archeologists.
Remember my previous review where I talked about the brat Alex? He grew up and is still annoying as hell. He dropped out of school to do some digging in China while hanging around with his uncle Jonathan. Who opened a nightclub called Imhotep. (My my, how original).
The O’Conner’s are asked by the British government to do one last spy job. (Didn’t knew the previous two where spy jobs, but oh well.) And they travel to China with the Eye of Shangri-La, the one thing that can awake the Terracotta Army and bring back hell on earth. Which of course happens? And the girl protection this from happening fails! So there’s a big not so happy family reunion and they decide to stop the Emperor from raising his entire army through a wild chase on the streets and in the mountains, where we meet Yeti’s. (Seriously, I thought the mini pygmies from part two where farfetched, but this does it!)
Rick is badly hurt and the only thing that can help him is getting to Shangri-La and to the fountain of eternal youth, which they do. He is healed and Alex finds out the girl protection the emperor from rising is immortal herself and way, way older than he is, by a couple of thousand years. What is not explained is if Rick is now immortal himself? Did nobody ask? But the Emperor get’s a sip from the fountain to and is now able to morph into stuff of nightmares. Basically, ugly ass CGI monsters.
The Emperor raises the terracotta army and if he gets them over the great Chinese wall they will be unstoppable. But the witch isn’t dead either and she casts a spell to raise all the people who died building the great wall to stop the emperor. And eventually the emperor and his army are stopped. Alex and his sweetie protector who now is mortal again fall in love. And Jonathan, big thief, steels the eye of Shangri-La and decided to move to Peru, in the hope, never ever meeting a mummy again. And after this movie, I hope so too! (but the plot is left open, because mummy’s where discovered short after this movie time wise ended, so theoretically there could be a fourth movie.
Can you tell I don’t like this movie? They should have stopped at number two. I give it points for the Terracotta Army story and of course Brendan Fraser, and bones points for him being half nude, but that’s about it. Hate the bad CGI, hate the Yeti’s, Alex is even more annoying than he was being a kid. Hate the fact Rachel isn’t in the movie, or Ardeth and so on and so on.
And now for the rating, I won’t give it more than 5.5 out of 10.
Love your hot cute girly geek.